Magic pick-up lines/puns(NSFW)

[LadyGrixis]

Well look out for my Big Furry Monster! (Sadly, the brackets won't make it show....lol.)

The mental image....

.....why?

Lol, because it was a moment and I had to seize the opportunity. I'm so sorry for all of you that have to read this..... -pats-

[ThassaDevoted]

The best way to deal with a BFM is a drop of honey

[ThassaDevoted]

I hope you're not pro red, cause I'd love to hit you with my Flame Javeline

[Steerpike]

"I'd mulligan till I had my hands on you."

[Thetrufflehunter]

I'd love to play you with my {glitaxian probe} deck.

[ThassaDevoted]

You must be Nessian because that is one nice asp

[Steerpike]

"I cost nothing to play, cuz I've got an affinity for you."

[Gorzo]

My God, this thread... I am at a serious loss for words.

LadyGrixis, I'm learning things about you that I am not sure how to process lol

[LadyGrixis]

My God, this thread... I am at a serious loss for words.

LadyGrixis, I'm learning things about you that I am not sure how to process lol

Shhhhh, it's okay Gorzo -pets-

[Mlerner12]

Good girls be warned. They call me the rod of ruin.

Omg....could I touch your {Isochron Scepter}?...

You sure can. Do you mind if I go get my rod of spanking?

this is getting weeeyuuuurd

[Mattao19]

Insanity Wolf has his own:

It doesn't matter the time of the month, ill still enter your {Blood Crypt}

[Mattao19]

Also did anyone see that reddit post where all of the shock lands are just vagina euphemisms.

{Temple Garden}
{Blood Crypt}
{Sacred Foundry}
{Stomping Ground}
{Steam Vents}
{Overgrown Tomb} my personal favorite lol
{Hallowed Fountain}
{Godless Shrine} another favorite
{Breeding Pool} another good one
{Watery Grave}

I died when I first read this lol

[LadyGrixis]

Wow........this all makes perfect sense now.

The creators of MtG are pervs, bahahaha!

[ThassaDevoted]

The imagery for each one is hilarious. Mtg is full of innuendoes.

[LordJanova]

My face hurts from laughing so much.