Touchy Subject #3 Everybody Is Special *NSFW

Quote from: Moneekahh on July 23, 2013, 04:48:31 AM

Quote from: FlickerYourOwnIdentity on July 21, 2013, 01:25:26 AM

Ok, let me dive in with a story.

I saw a kid with his dad who was roughly 5 outside of a Harris Teeter. The kid yelled at his dad because he yelled, "He won the t-ball game and he deserved the biggest frapachino they had at Starbucks, not the grande.  That he hated his dad for not buying the biggest size."

My God.  I literally ran up to that dad as he was on his way inside the Harris Teeter without his child.  I struck up a conversation with him, and asked why he looked so depressed.  He said and I quote, "My kid just did something remeadial, now I have to go buy him his favorite thing.  Money is tight so I got a size smaller, and he threw it at me.  He said he hated me."  he looked like he failed his son.  I promptly told him that a spanking never hurt anyone's character.  That his kid shouldn't expect so much, and that they should praise him so much.  We exchange phone numbers, and we talk from time to time.

He has sent me a gift on $100 dollars recently for helping him that day.  I sent it back, because his money was still tight, blah blah blah.

The point is all that building up with positive rienforcement, and instead of punishment you say, "use your words".  It is making our kids assholes and bitches. 

Sure every now and then, you tell your kid they did a good job.  But you don't overdo it.  If you have a child who wants to be a professional basketball player, and they suck, what do you do.  You don't tell them that they are amazing forever.  Because guess what, that child grows up, tries his hand at basketball as his sole carrier.  And fails miserably because he always thought he was amazing so he never attempted to get better.

Sure it is exaggerated, but you get the point.

I take it you have never taken the time to learn anything about child development. There is so much in your comment that is just completely false.

For starters, "a spanking never hurt anyone". Are you serious? Think about what a spanking is for a second. That is when you are physically punishing a child for doing something that you disapprove of. Think about how ridiculous that sounds! You are physically harming a child because they aren't doing exactly what you tell them to, when you tell them to. Why is it that we as a society believe that it is acceptable to hurt the most vulnerable people at the most vulnerable times? It's gross.

Also, there is a reason that positive discipline is on the rise and it's the discipline style recommended by specialists. Negativity doesn't do any good for anyone, especially children. Kids are using their experience in life to mold their future selves, why would we, as the role models in their lives, want to make those experiences negative ones? I promise you, positive parenting does not turn your kid into an .rearexit..

The key is to respect our children, treat them the way you'd want to be treated (even while disciplining) they are people too.

when I was growing up, you mess up, you get your @$$ beat. I love both my parents dearly, and I am thankful that they spanked me. Kids today are allowed to run wild and are not punished properly. This is another example of the wussification of America.

Why does discipline need to be physical? There are plenty of answers to besides physical harm. While some may be thankful that they were hit as kids, others suffer emotional scars. There are better ways to raise children. Plain and simple.

And the thought that people choosing not to hit their kids is the "wussification of America" is beyond ignorant.

Spanking only causes physical pain.  It does not damage them in any way, and used appropriately its just fine.  There is a time when it turns into child abuse, but used rarely, who cares?

It may seem "just fine", but spanking is a quick fix. It doesn't teach your child that what they have done is wrong. It teaches them that of they do it, they will be hit. Great message.

Quote from: Taysby on July 23, 2013, 11:49:14 AM

Spanking only causes physical pain.  It does not damage them in any way, and used appropriately its just fine.  There is a time when it turns into child abuse, but used rarely, who cares?

It may seem "just fine", but spanking is a quick fix. It doesn't teach your child that what they have done is wrong. It teaches them that of they do it, they will be hit. Great message.

Exactly! How does striking the fear of getting hit into a child help them curb their behavior? It's an easy way out because people don't want to talk to their kids and make them understand why something is wrong. They'd rather pump them full of sugar and stick them in front of a TV with lights, violence, and loud noises blasting into their tiny, developing brains all day.