Self harm?

Started by That_Guy, August 11, 2013, 10:27:19 AM

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That_Guy

I feel really uncomfortable sharing this but it has gotten out of hand.....

Being a magic player and going to school dont mix well (as some of you may know) especially when you play mostly at school, the bullies get to you ALOT. I am writing this because i need help, some of you may not want to read this but if you dont, fine, walk away. Self harm is a huge problem for me, i am being bullied around the clock, and a lot of my friends have turned against me in the past year, so i do infact do certain things to my wrists. Now, people are starting to notice, one of the people that saw actually started being nice to me, it was an act too so now my whole class is against me, i cant tell anyone that i know about them or i will be beat up (i tried). The harming just gets worse as the days go on and i realised this morning when i woke up, i need to stop this or i wont be around much longer. Does anyone know anyone that has been in a similar situation to this? Or have you possibly even been this way? Anyway i will stop rambling on, i need to find other things to do than hurt myself when im feeling like this? Any ideas? Im afraid my family will see my arms and i dont want that to happen, thanks...

EvACiDe

Quote from: That_Guy on August 11, 2013, 10:27:19 AM
I feel really uncomfortable sharing this but it has gotten out of hand.....

Being a magic player and going to school dont mix well (as some of you may know) especially when you play mostly at school, the bullies get to you ALOT. I am writing this because i need help, some of you may not want to read this but if you dont, fine, walk away. Self harm is a huge problem for me, i am being bullied around the clock, and a lot of my friends have turned against me in the past year, so i do infact do certain things to my wrists. Now, people are starting to notice, one of the people that saw actually started being nice to me, it was an act too so now my whole class is against me, i cant tell anyone that i know about them or i will be beat up (i tried). The harming just gets worse as the days go on and i realised this morning when i woke up, i need to stop this or i wont be around much longer. Does anyone know anyone that has been in a similar situation to this? Or have you possibly even been this way? Anyway i will stop rambling on, i need to find other things to do than hurt myself when im feeling like this? Any ideas? Im afraid my family will see my arms and i dont want that to happen, thanks...

Well to be honest, I used to be in a similar situation back in middle school. And when you're that age, the ONLY thing you want is to fit in, trust me I get that. But also when you're finally out of school, everything like that is going to be a distant memory and will mean absolutely nothing. I am 24 now and once you do get older it becomes a lot easier for you to accept the fact that you don't care what other people think about you. It's a simple fact that you can't have EVERYONE like you. But there are ppl out there that will. As far as the self-mutilation goes, I can't say I have done that but I do understand the despair of bullying. Now that I have added my 10 cents, perhaps a more professional setting can help you with that such as a psychiatrist. I don't mean that to be rude but self mutilation is dangerous and if it continues I would urge you to see one.

Birdbrain

Being the outcast stinks. I have a friend that was kind of in the same situation. You want me to ask her what to tell you?

And you should speak up for yourself. Tell the bullies that there bullying isn't appreciated. People could be not liking you because your being a push over. Don't react to what the bullies say/do, and they'll stop

Vampyvyrus

Hey man I've had a few friends to through this situation, ive had this conversation before. I know you probably don't want to hear this but...you need to sit down and talk to your family about it. They need to know what's going on. I understand it'll be hard. But your family cares about you even if sometimes they maybe don't show it. I know your in pain emotionally and it's understandable. But please try to look at it from this prospective...imagine the emotional pain your family would go through if they walked in and found you a little too late. I'm not trying to guilt trip you, but that's a very real issue in this kind of situation. If you can't bring yourself to informing your family I implore you to talk to someone else about it. A friend is always the best. If that's not available then try the guidance councilor at school. If you want, pm me and ill give you my number and we can txt or talk. Sometimes you'll feel better about things after you talk to someone about them even if its a complete stranger.

Xaol

Bro. Pause. You need to reassess your priorities here. Self harm is REALLY serious. You NEED to talk to your family about this, and consider switching schools if that is a viable option. Additionally, if you need someone to talk to, PM me and I would be happy to call you.
There are numerous ways for you to help yourself, but they all start with you accepting that you need help.
Please take time to sit down your family and explain what is going on.

Imink

I've been there before and it's hard to get out of that place to make a better situation out of the very crappy one you already have. There's plenty of people out there that are dedicated to helping people with things of this nature. I'd start with a school therapist. There's also plenty of organizations that help with things like this to write love on her arms is a good one. But when you get better wear the scars proudly and be the best you that you can be. Because your no longer that person your the person that's gotten out of that mess that is self harm and suicide I can only wish you good luck and happy thoughts and if you'd like to talk to someone about this feel free to message me.


This is the to write love on her arms website http://twloha.com/find-help

Gorzo

I agree with others who have posted here. If you are cutting yourself, please tell your parents, a school counselor, teacher, or other authority in your life who you trust - you need to get a professional's help with that, which there is no shame in. It's just important for your health (mental and physical).

If you feel your life is in danger, please call the suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255
Bullies are dirt, no matter what misery they are putting you through, it's not worth throwing your life away. Your life will get better, and theirs will get worse. Living happily will be your best revenge.

Coffee Vampire

Someone in my family had self destructive habits, and when my whole family found out, we did what was necesary to help, and long story short, it all turned out to be a happy ending. Secrets like self harm aren't meant to be kept from your family. If one of my family was hurting themselves and I didn't know about it, and later found out, there is nothing I wouldn't give to go back in time and know from the start. Your family isn't going to bully you for cutting yourself. They will help you get out of it. It may involve having to see a counselor or even going to an institution for a month or so, but that is how people stop self harm. And it all starts with talking with your family.

As for the kids at school who bully you for playing magic and even bully you because you self harm, they don't even know what they are doing. They are bullying you because it makes them feel cool, and it makes them feel like they fit in with their other mean friends. They don't know the consequences of their actions. It's hard for me to say this because I was never really bullied, but don't let them get to you. I'm not saying don't let them make you mad. You're going to be mad at them. I'm not saying don't hate them. You have every right to. I am saying: don't believe the thigs they say are the truth. Things that bullies say are lies. Do not believe anything that they tell you. Do not let what bullies say or do to you affect what you do to yourself, and do not let what bullies think of you affect how you think of yourself.

MuggyWuggy

Don't cut yourself. Simple as that. Once you keep going, you won't stop.

Until you're about 20 - you're going to be harassed by your peers. It may continue for life if you allow others to affect you. Many people have been ostracized at one period of time in their life, you're no different. How you let those people affect you is.


EvACiDe

That's not necessarily true. Ppl the cut themselves don't always continue on that path.

5/9 Turtle

Don't listen to the bullies not only do they do that to look cool some actually do it because they feel insecure about themselves. I was also in a not as serious situation ( I just went straight to thinking about suicide, because of one of my 'friends') but I started to talk to a friend and it got so much better. So go and talk to your family you'll put them at ease and you can get the help you need

Wingnut

Been in your shoes(mind you a long time ago), including the cutting. Here's the thing, I cut for a couple years (including into my mud 20's, divorce is great). Are you suicidal, or are you a cutter? Only you know the answer to that with 100% honesty, I did it 15% for attention, 85% for the release of adrenaline that makes you forget about the bullcrap. Be honest with yourself, if you need help, please get it tonight, there is NOTHING in your young life that is worth killing yourself, you have been through less than 25% of your life, and how much of that has been like this? Focus on you, your grades, and where you want to be 10 years from now. Get it so that you are the one that is "hiring them" in 10 years, and in your mind, you can tell them to fornicate them self. If your doing it for attention and adrenaline, keep it away from the wrist and knock it off. If you genuinely want to not be alive, please, for yourself and your unborn babies and the life that you deserve to live, get help IMMEDIATELY.

-your friends

Silent1236

To reiterate what everyone else has, talk to your family about it. They can help you out immensely! 

However, I am one to find any possible way out of a difficult conversation, and I know I'm probably not the only one, so if you find yourself putting it off and never really bringing yourself to start the conversation, replace the self harm!  Any time you think of cutting yourself, stop and go for a walk/jog/run (preferably), or if you're more like me and don't enjoy running, play video games (preferably something with an engrossing story) or some other source of entertainment (like a book!) just to get your mind onto different things.

Just remember, things do get better. I graduated three months ago and am already about 800% happier than I ever was in high school. People in high school are dicks. Unfortunately, there's no getting around that. If people there don't want to be polite there, go to your lgs as frequently as possible and play Magic with people you already know have at least one similar interest with you. 

Just keep your head up and push through the .poo.. Life gets much better!  High school is only four years out of your life. That's not very long at all :)

EvACiDe

Quote from: Silent1236 on August 11, 2013, 11:39:58 PM
Just keep your head up and push through the .poo.. Life gets much better!  High school is only four years out of your life. That's not very long at all :)

And when you go to your high school reunions, all those bullies more than likely will have no jobs, end up in jail or dead.

Langku

Quote from: EvACiDe on August 12, 2013, 12:12:21 AM
Quote from: Silent1236 on August 11, 2013, 11:39:58 PM
Just keep your head up and push through the .poo.. Life gets much better!  High school is only four years out of your life. That's not very long at all :)

And when you go to your high school reunions, all those bullies more than likely will have no jobs, end up in jail or dead.

I've found that, like the rest of us, bullies often grow up & turn into better people

That_Guy- like any addiction, it will be hard to stop but sharing with people who understand and will support you is crucial. Talking about it here was a smart first step but this forum is limited both in our personal presence and in our knowledge of how to help you. Feel free to use us but please talk to someone you know you can trust and who can get you help. You're not bad for doing it, you're not alone in it, and you can move past this but it will take some help.