Best chuck Norris lines?

[BcBudds]

Mines prolly

Chuck Norris wil lnever die from a heart attack because his heart isnt that foolish to attack him

[Chadgamer]

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a deadly snake, and after 3 days of agonizing pain, the snake finally died.

[Keyeto]

After acquiring a book of 400, several shirts, and a couple posters, it's hard to name a favorite.

"Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head" "Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door" and "A cobra once bit Chuck Norris. After several days of excruciating pain, the cobra died." Are a few of my favorites.

[Sevenfold]

When chuck norris jumps in water he doesnt get wet, water gets chuck norris.
I miss good old barrens chat from (wow)

[Quackmaster5]

When monsters go to bed at night, they check their closets for chuck Norris.

When chuck Norris's mother was going into labor, he was the doctor delivering himself

Chuck Norris can connect three.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity....twice.

Chuck Norris was the first person to discover uranium. It's his DNA.

Ever wonder who taught the force to Yoda? It was Chuck Norris.

[Kareason]

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. I'm not talking about heritage, the man ate a damn Jeep! 

[Dudecore]

Trick question. There are no good Chuck Norris lines.

[AgrusKos]

The Black Eyed Peas were just called the Peas. Then Chuck Norris got done with them

[Xanzurth]

Chuck Norris tears can cure cancer. To bad he never cries. EVER!!!!

[Xanzurth]

Chuck Norris can round house kick so fast it is possible for him to round house your face yesterday!

[Langku]

Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They're now known as the Islands.

Chuck Norris actually lives in a round house.

There are no streets named after Chuck Norris because no one crosses Chuck Norris.

[Mikefrompluto]

Overgrown Chin
{B}{B}
Instant
Replace all instances of Chuck Norris with Bruce Campbell.

"Hail to the king baby!"

[AgrusKos]

Overgrown Chin
{B}{B}
Instant
Replace all instances of Chuck Norris with Bruce Campbell.

"Hail to the king baby!"

Chuck Norris will come for you...

[Mikefrompluto]

Overgrown Chin
{B}{B}
Instant
Replace all instances of Chuck Norris with Bruce Campbell.

"Hail to the king baby!"

Chuck Norris will come for you...

Ill just hide behind Bruce's chin. Chuck's roundhouse kick can't penetrate it.

[Kareason]

Pinatas were made in an attempt to get Chuck Norris to stop kicking the people of Mexico. Sadly this backfired, as all it has resulted in is Chuck Norris now looking for candy after he kicks his victims.




The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.